The Attachment Style Assessment: Understanding Your Relationship Patterns

Attachment theory, developed by John Bowlby and Mary Ainsworth, describes how our early relationships with caregivers shape our expectations and behaviors in close relationships throughout life. These patterns, known as attachment styles, influence how we connect with others, handle intimacy, manage conflict, and respond to relationship stress.

The primary attachment styles include secure attachment, where people feel comfortable with intimacy and independence; anxious attachment, characterized by worry about availability and abandonment; avoidant attachment, marked by discomfort with closeness and preference for independence; and patterns that show characteristics of multiple styles.

Your attachment style isn’t fixed—it can change over time through new relationship experiences, personal growth, and intentional work. Understanding your attachment patterns helps you recognize automatic reactions in relationships and develop healthier ways of connecting with others.

Read each statement and consider how well it describes your typical thoughts, feelings, or behaviors in close relationships. Select the response that most accurately reflects your usual patterns in relationships, not how you wish you were.